Confronting the Nightmares of Emetophobia Through the Nine of Swords
This is something I have dealt with for decades.
I have dealt with insomnia for years, and one of the drugs I have taken for a long time in a high dose; I have been weaning off of it for a few months.
I cannot wean off of it entirely, but I am managing on the lowest dose with another safer drug.
I had to switch doctors back in April, and she said there were some risks associated with the drug, which is why the lower the dose I am on, the better.
I have found something that works even with the lowest dose along with the other drug. However, I was struggling as I could not get good quality sleep.
And a few weeks back, I was told to try magnesium glycinate to help with sleep.
So I figured, why not? I will get some.
I tried it, and I fell asleep quickly, but I woke up in the night feeling ill, and I feared I would get sick.
Fortunately, I fought it off and never tried it again after that. However, I do fight my urge to puke (and usually am very successful) because I am emetophobic.
That was the same reason I begged my doctor who prescribed me Ozempic to write a script for Zofran.
That is especially since I heard that nausea and vomiting are common side effects.
Luckily it was rare that I needed it as I only got nauseous a handful of times by overeating at the beginning.
I struggled more with constipation but that was nothing compared to being sick (in my view anyway).
I have not been sick in over a decade now. So, let's talk about emetophobia and the best tarot card associated with it: The Nine of Swords.
Emetophobia and the Nine of Swords
For those living with emetophobia - the intense fear of vomiting - the Nine of Swords tarot card can serve as a powerful symbol of the internal turmoil and distress this phobia can cause.
In my case, I know it was caused by a traumatic event when I was a young child.
I mean, I could work on overcoming it, but I never did because it does not usually interfere with my life.
And if someone in the house is sick, I must keep away. My husband realizes this. My daughter gets it, and thankfully, it is a rarity.
Emetophobia is somewhat common, and a simple hatred of throwing up is not considered emetophobia as a phobia is a lot more than a case of hating something badly.
Let's discuss the Nine of Swords in relation to this.
Depicted as a figure sitting upright in bed, head in hand, the Nine of Swords represents the anguish of racing thoughts, worry, and feelings of dread that plague the emetophobic mind.
Just as their anguished thoughts consume the figure in the card, those with a fear of vomiting often find themselves plagued by intrusive, catastrophic thoughts about the possibility of getting sick.
The restless, anxious energy of the Nine of Swords mirrors the experience of those with emetophobia lying awake at night, consumed by the fear of nausea or vomiting.
The sensation of impending doom captured in the card's imagery echoes the constant state of hypervigilance and anticipatory anxiety that can dominate the lives of those with this phobia.
The Nine of Swords Speaks About Something Beyond the Fear
Beyond the sense of mental anguish, the Nine of Swords also speaks to the profound isolation that can accompany emetophobia.
Like the solitary figure depicted, those struggling with this condition may feel deeply alone in their internal battles, reluctant to share their irrational fears with others who may not understand.
Yet, the Nine of Swords also offers a glimmer of hope. Though the figure appears defeated, they are still sitting upright, suggesting the possibility of breaking free from the grip of these tormenting thoughts.
This card reminds us that the path to healing and self-acceptance remains open even in our darkest moments.
For the emetophobic individual, confronting the Nine of Swords can be a call to acknowledge the very real emotional turmoil caused by this phobia.
It is an invitation to explore the roots of these anxieties with compassion and to seek out the support and coping strategies necessary to reclaim a sense of control and peace of mind.
Just as the Nine of Swords represents the nightmares of the mind, it also points the way toward the dawn - a reminder that with time, understanding, and the right tools, the debilitating grip of emetophobia can be loosened, allowing for a more restful, fulfilling life.
That does not mean again you have to heal it entirely if the idea of that is a burden to you, especially if others are pressuring you to do that.
I mean, if this is something you absolutely want to do, then by all means! Otherwise, you want to work through it enough to live your life without it taking over, even if you don't conquer the fear entirely.
If you want to join the Creative Tarot Circle on Facebook, I would love to have you! I am putting out more engaging content on there.
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Beautiful, Miriam, thank you for writing about this! I've had emetophobia since I was a child (I'm 50 now). When I was a kid, no one had heard of it, it didn't even have a name as far as I knew. I just knew that I lived in terror of it (I still do). My loved ones basically thought I was being ridiculous and just needed to get over it. I'm so grateful to people like you who continue to bring it into the light. You've inspired me to consider writing about my experiences with it in case that might be helpful to anyone else. ❤️🙏